A Class Drugs at Your Doorstep

After my high school tuition in chemistry it has become very apparent to me how simple it is to produce a class drugs. It takes only a few simple steps to extract chemical compounds change them through some reactions and voila! Methamphetamine.

Now before reading let it be known that I DO NOT! condone the making, use or sale of drugs. It really is a major factor in crime, family destruction and even death. So take this into account before reading this. This is mainly aimed at being satirical so don’t get angry at this.

My Meth Business

So in my year of chemistry I have been informed of many certain chemical properties including their reactivity with other chemicals and many processes to catalyse these reactions. So with this knowledge I am now capable to start my own drug empire down here in my little country of New Zealand!

I’m coming out of high school now so I’m in the prime of my life and have a whole life of expansion ahead of me, so by starting my meth business now I can get an early start at cracking open this blooming business. This can only be profitable! If i start small with a few key ideas and factors I can’t go wrong.

Factors I need to take into account

- The police, as much of a friendly bunch as they are. A bribe here and there should keep them off my case and really a few thousand dollars here and there won’t set the overall business back much considering I’m selling top notch high school grade skag as the boys from trainspotting will refer to it as.

- Objective. my companies first objective should be growth rather than profit. That means branching out, cheap merchandise, many employees and opening foreign lines with international oppurtunities. The trading of my company may even come into play as the company can be easily passed off as a pharmaceutical production line, this would allow for a larger capital revunue and further expansion of the business.

- Target audience. As my initial aim is growth the product will most likely be highly cut in order to allow for a cheaper sale price and to hook younger consumers. This will reduce OD’s and allow for a lower target audience who can grow with the company as well.

With these points of action into play we have to consider how to get our hands on the initial reactants to then create our final product. We can’t have 30 large men walking into gardening stores buyingtres and litres of chemicals without raising suspiscion so we have to recruit the working man, woman and child to pitch into this rapidly growing business.

Every sick mother and child will push for that extra prescription of sudo ephidrine for our active ingredient. Farmers will be cut in to buy more chemicals for our cooking and chemistry teachers and legit chemists will provide us with our equipment.

Where can we go wrong!!! This is the inevitable way to a life time of wealth, once I have a self sustaining business I can take my cut and leave a protege to run the business into the ground. They always say, leave while your ahead.

Then with all my crack and meth money I can flee the country to a private island in the sun. It’s as easy as that. So the moral of the story is do high school chemistry and find the ensuing crack wealth.

 Thanks for reading!

Read my other articles!

The Occupy Movement
Special Birthday Wishes
Easy Leg Workout
Differentiation: Quotient Rule
Differentiation: Product Rule

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