Of all species (plants, insects, fish, mammals, birds) that ever existed on Earth, 99.9 percent are now extinct. The reasons for such massive numbers are due, primarily, to five major extinctions over the years. Those, in turn, were caused by climatic changes, bolide impact (something from space slamming into the Earth), plate tectonics (like the breakup of Pangaea), volcanic activity, or a combination of one or more of these. Okay, Mother Nature goofs up occasionally producing a species that just isn’t fit to survive and she handles that by letting it die out. (Personally, I don’t understand why humans are still around. She really goofed up by letting us continue to reproduce.)

Modern day conservationists go to such extremes to protect these animals/plants that people end up suffering. They suffer by having to tolerate the little pests, they have to spend thousands, millions, and even billions of dollars to protect the pests, and, if they kill one, they are fined. What’s the fuss if some plant, lizard, rat, or bird dies out?

The Kangaroo Rat

Some years ago in Riverside County (California) James Elliot lived adjacent to a wide-open field and had a twenty-foot patch of two-foot tall weeds within ten feet of his house and garage. The county Fire Department gave him a ticket and ordered him to clear out the weeds in the interest of fire-safety.

In case you’re not familiar with the dynamics of Southern California, it’s enough, here, to simply explain that every year wildfires sweep across the state, destroying hundreds of thousands of acres of land. In an effort to control the spread of such fires many counties have passed ordinances requiring property owners to cut down weeds and undergrowth within some distance of their buildings.

In this case, rather than fight the city, James went out with his weed-eater and chopped down every weed within thirty feet of his house and garage. For complying with the fire department’s wishes, he was fined $1,200 by another county agency because he cut down the habitat of the endangered kangaroo rat. The really cute part of this story is that when James appeared in court, the fire department REFUSED to appear on his behalf and, because it was a government utility, he was unable to subpoena them without an extended fight.

James lost and was fined the original $1,200 as well as $600 for court costs.

Wild Fire

In another example of conservation stupidity, picture this situation. The wind fanned a fire and drove it up one hill and down into a valley. At the top of the next hill the California Department of Forestry crew watched as a bulldozer went back and forth, cutting a firebreak. One pass, an eight foot break, a second pass and they had fifteen feet. A third pass and a fourth, and when the fire reached the top of the hill there was nothing but dirt for thirty feet. Without fuel, the fire died out. One entire front of the fire, stretching across nearly a half-mile, was dead. Yes, the fire was burning on a two mile front, but this one-half mile was dead.

That was the 60s. Today the CDF is not allowed to use dozers on a lot of their fire lines. The reason — they might upset the ecology!

Okay, let’s analyze that concept. We have a fire roaring across the hill. Even cockroaches aren’t surviving. Kangaroo rats — nope. The protected cabbage weed — no way, it’s charcoal. And the fire will continue down the hill across the next one and the next until it has turned 10,000 acres into blackened waste. Could the introduction of a bulldozer have stopped it? Quite possibly. Could the introduction of a bulldozer have prevented the death of rats, cockroaches, weeds, and whatever? Again, possibly, but the firefighters are denied the use of a powerful tool because we are so concerned with the ecology today — an ecology that was wiped out by the fire.

After reading the draft of this a CDF captain told me, “I know the State Parks and BLM people are very sensitive to anyone doing anything on their lands. It’s only OK if it’s all natural like a volcano or a meteor to wipe out their precious animal and plant species.”

An argument used by environmentalists is that fire is nature’s way of rearranging the local ecosystems. That’s fine when a fire is started by a lightning strike or spontaneous combustion of a bunch of brush deep within a gully. My problem with their argument is that many of the fires are not caused by natural occurrences. Maybe some drunk tossed a cigarette butt into some weeds, a couple kids were shooting off bottle-rockets, or some jerk just decided to light a fire in the boonies. Here man is the cause of the death of a bunch of plants and animals and perhaps some of them are on an endangered list, but why is that okay? Don’t fret, more stupidity follows.

And in Los Angeles

There was once a drainage ditch on the outskirts of Los Angeles. It was about twenty-two meters wide and, in the middle, there was a slightly raised portion. Some dirt caught on that raised portion and, over time, more dirt landed there and ultimately a few seeds managed to put down roots.

The Army Corps of Engineers was charged with clearing this particular stretch of ditch, but because of budget cuts they could not take care of it for eight or ten years. In those years the batch of dirt and weeds grew into an area of about four by ten meters of solid growth. Unfortunately that growth clogged the drainage ditch. One year some light rains nearly caused the ditch to overflow and several concerned residents tried to clean out the ditch to protect their homes.

Oops! The ditch was under the control of the Army Corps of Engineers who couldn’t be bothered with such a small patch of dirt. But they did have the time and resources to join with the conservationists to stop the citizens from cleaning out the ditch. The reason was that some kind of endangered salamander or lizard had taken up residence in that weed patch.

When the heavy rains came a few years later the ditch overflowed because it was clogged by that patch of dirt and weeds. Because of the flooding several homes were washed out and people lost hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of property. Did they have any recourse? No, because the Army Corps of Engineers was acting in the best interests of that lizard. It didn’t matter that the lizard died in the flood. On the plus side is that the flood also cleaned out all the weeds and dirt, a feat the Army Corps of Engineers didn’t have time to do.

Another Example

My son, Greg, gave me this example. He is a geologist and has been in and studied this particular area.

In Northern Las Vegas there is an exposure of sediments that were originally deposited by an upwelling of sediment-laden natural springs. The springs formed along a fault between two major mountain complexes in the area and, being between two mountains, were subject to being covered by alluvial material washing down from the hills. The movement along the fault has allowed only a small amount of these spring deposits to escape burial to the south, for now. What remains will either be buried by the local alluvial fans or will wash out into the valley: the area is not long for this world. Geologically it was doomed from its first gurgle 30,000 years ago. The sediments remaining along this narrow geologic escape route contain a very specific concentration of hydrous calcium sulfate (Gypsum) that is unique to the surrounding area. This gypsiferous sediment does not have much growing in it. An ocassional buckwheat or sage bush can take hold and grow, but the soil is just not very plant friendly. Except for one — the Bear Paw Poppy. Imagine a less succulent, flakier version of an artichoke about one-third that size and wearing a three day old beard all over its body.

It can only grow in this gypsum-rich sediment exposed along this vanishing valley (8,000 acres tops). It is eaten by the desert tortoise and nothing else. Their tap root is only a few feet long with little horizontal growth so it suffers when it is too dry. This little weed is going to die along with the valley. It’s too specialized and it can’t adapt fast enough to migrate. Developers have to pay monitors to find and transplant them off a proposed site because they’re endangered. The stupid part comes from the fact that the desert tortoise is protected as well and gets the same treatment, so it begs the question — What do you do if you see a tortoise eating a bear paw poppy? Endangered eating endangered.

If someone says to seperate the two, then the tortoise can’t eat. If they come back with a suggestion of feeding the tortoise something else so he doesn’t starve, then he becomes reliant on humans and can’t survive in the wild. You can’t grow extra poppies because there is not enough area to do it. If one answers with, “let nature take it’s course” and allow the tortoise to feed naturally, then shouldn’t we also let the silly poppy go the way of the Dodo along with the valley it grew with “naturally”?

One Final Example of Stupidity

I’ll admit that this one is totally unsubstantiated. There has, indeed, been a petition filed and as of this time, July, 2008, I still can’t find if any action has been taken on it.

Did you know that the recent (last 10 years) popularity of waxing, shaving, and electrolysis of the pubic regions to remove hair has an unexpected environmental risk? Apparently these actions are destroying the habitat of a particular species of crab louse.

Although it is not yet on the IUCN endangered or threatened list I can’t wait until some conservationist manages to outlaw any removal of pubic hair just so we can have more of these little things jumping from person to person.

Last

All this just to say that conservation and concern for the environment are fine unless carried to extremes. What is the dividing line that marks something as extreme? I have no idea, but it just seems that when your conservation efforts cost me money, upset my lifestyle, or just plain irritate me, you’ve gone too far!